2017 : CRUDE Issues a Berl Order!
CRUDE’s Berl Order Leads to Epic Clash in the Toxic Rouxxx
A FAUCET NEAR YOU – When the Sewage in Water Board issued the alarm, New Orleans was a little confused. Some problem had occurred at some undisclosed time to compromise the drinking water, and now the city was under a Boil Order. This bit of technical jargon, unfamiliar to most, was soon decoded by the master crawfish boilers of the land as a Berl Orda, and thus they began seasoning the water supply as the necessary first step. But alas, the amoeba that had caused this “orda” responded in a strange way to all the berl seasoning – growing quickly to tremendous proportions to become Zomoeba! The city had unwittingly created a Toxic Rouxxx within its own pipes. But a certain crawfish too was affected, pumping itself up on the spoiled supply to become one monstrous mudbug. While New Orleans panicked, and tried to horde all the boiled garlic it could, the two mutant beasts set to battle, heaving into combat as the spicy waters surged around them. “We have tolerated water for too long, and paid the price,” decreed the Shitty Council. “Water, this vile substance, the only fluid suitable for flushing and scrubbing, shall no longer be a legal beverage in New Orleans. For here on, New Orleans drinks beer or nothing!” |
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The krewe of c.r.u.d.e. is one of approximately 17 currently unindicted members of the confederacy of dunces known as krewe du vieux. Dedicated to ensuring that CRUDE behavior CRUDE displays, CRUDE, humor and CRUDE spectacles are forever a part of Mardi Gras in New Orleans. The Krewe of C.R.U.D.E. and Krewe du Vieux preserve the historical spirit of Mardi Gras by parading through the French Quarter with handmade floats and featuring the finest fucking New Orleans brass bands.)
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See you in the gutter, February 11, 2017!
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